Twilight Truth
by The-Onyx-LoLita
Summary: Bella was so desperate to become a vampire, but was the real reason to spend forever with Edward?
1. Chapter One: Bad Reviews

Bad Reviews-

I gazed around me with my newly acquired, perfect eyesight that made every colour around me defined with breath taking accuracy. I had persuaded Edward to change me before he had promised. I still have no idea as to how I did it but I am glad I did. Living with that stupid, weak, mortal body whilst my love lived forever. Never grew old and would never die.

I gazed at the reflection that was displayed in the mirror. I could not believe it was me. The features were so defined and my eyes glowed the amazing colour of crimson.

My reflection was running her hands over her cheekbones, her mouth a gape and her eyes wide with shock.

"I look so…different!" I gasped, looking down at my body. I gently lifted up the bottom of my upper attire to see that the skin under my black tank-top was a beautiful, marble white and looked completely flawless.

Edward walked over to me, looking like he might want to kill something. "I know it is amazing - and you do indeed look beautiful - but I am still not happy with changing you before your graduation. What are we going to do if you suddenly sparkle during the ceremony?!" He asked, almost growling.

I playfully shrugged my shoulders. "Scream and run?" I replied, making it a joke but Edward looked less than amused.

Emmett snickered from behind me. "I don't scream," he chuckled, "but I know that Edward does. Like a girl in fourth grade. Pigtails and everything!" When Edward gave him one of those looks that the expression: 'If looks could kill' was made for, Emmett fell about in a chorus of hysterical laughter.

Rosalie snorted with discontent. "I don't like it!" She said before standing up and storming out of the house, slamming the front door on her way.

Emmett abruptly stopped his laughter and followed her.

"Personally, I like it." Jasper said, walking behind me and running his fingers through my hair. "I don't have to worry about losing control and drinking your life away anymore." He whispered in my ear, so low that no one else could hear it.

"Maybe you won't turn up in my ward so much now." Carlise snickered.

Both Alice and Esme smiled at me.

Everyone was happy that I had become what I was. A vampire. All except Edward.

He still stared at me with smouldering, gold eyes that were filled with fury. "What was the hurry?" He blurted.

I looked at him with an expression of shock plastered upon my face. "What do you mean? I was just taking precautions."

"What sort of _precautions_?" He asked, his eyes intense and his jaw held tight.

"Well, for me, an ordinary task was a health hazard, right? What with me being such a klutz." I said, looking down at my nails, admiring how even becoming a vampire could make them exceedingly perfect.

Edward made a snorting noise within his throat. "I'm not that stupid!" He growled in my ear when he walked past, following the same path that both Rosalie and Emmett had taken a few seconds previous.

I turned to look at the vampires that surrounded me.

"He still believes his theory, I think." Carlise almost whispered before walking into the kitchen.

Esme and Alice followed suit, leaving me on my own with Jasper.

"He's just missing your mouth-watering smell." Jasper grumbled, his eyes turning to gaze into my own.

My heart thudded. I pulled an end of my hair toward my face and sniffed at it. "My hair still smells like strawberries." I said, a grin on my face. That strawberry shampoo reminded me of the day that I had made my acquaintance with the Cullens.

Jasper chuckled under his breath. "It certainly does." He then walked closer towards me and placed a hand on my bare shoulder. I could feel the velvet texture of his hands against my naked skin, making me almost shiver with surprise. "Just ignore him. He's being an idiot." He whispered into my ear.

"I just feel wrong. Upsetting him like this." I responded in a hushed voice, that was almost inaudible to me, let alone Jasper.

Edward returned hours later, over thirty minutes after Rosalie and Emmett had walked through the door. He sat himself down on the sofa, where I had been sat waiting for him to return.

"Better now?" I asked, turning my attention to him and trying to sound like my normal, emotionless self.

His quickly snapped his head round to look at me and gritted his teeth. "Whatever you're up to, I don't like it. There is more of a reason for you wanting to become a vampire than how clumsy you are. You lived for eighteen years like it, I am sure that one more wouldn't have hurt." He spat, sounding completely out of character for the normal Edward.

I stared at him. "I wanted to be with you, Edward. That's-"

"No, it wasn't." He growled, standing to his feet and storming up the stairs like and annoyed, thirteen year old girl.

I turned to Jasper, who had just walked through the kitchen door and was now leaning against the staircase.

"He thinks he knows everything and hates it when he gets out smarted." He explained in a bland voice, winking at the end of the sentence to add a bit of emotion and fun.

I smiled weakly back. Edward had thought he had seen through an act. I gulped, acknowledging that it was loud enough for Jasper to hear before walking up the stairs and making my way towards Edward's room.

"Come in." He grumbled after I knocked on the door three times.

I slowly pushed the door open, listening to it make an eerie creaking sound before standing in the room. "What was that all about?" I asked in a voice that I hoped sounded a little more shaken and surprised that upset and guilty.

Edward sighed. "Sorry, I thought you were going all stereotypical. You know, wanting power and eternal life, etc."

I breathed a sigh of relief. "Of course not." I chuckled.

Edward shook his head smiling. "I must be getting silly with my old age."

I snickered and sat on the bed beside him, wrapping my arms around his shoulders, hoping that the truth never got out.

If he discovered, would he even let me stay in the same house? Would he even have anything to do with me? It was too late now. My heart was made up.

_Please review! Hopefully, not bad ones! _


	2. Chapter Two: Dirty Little Secret

Dirty Little Secret-

I plodded down the stairs, feeling deflated. Edward knew that something was wrong between us but as to what it was, he had not go a clue. I knew what it was. There was something between us, or more like someone.

I landed with a thud on the flat surface of the floor just before Jasper moved to stand in front of me.

"Does he know?" He asked me through gritted teeth.

I shook my head. I was amazed that Jasper had been able to conceal his thoughts away from Edward do effectively without even the slightest bit of information being leaked through the brainwaves that Edward read like a book.

"Jasper…We can't go on like this." I said, tilting my head up to look him in the eye.

He quickly gave a glance in both directions, grabbed my wrist and lead me out of the back door. We walked fro what felt like ages before we came to a small clearing where we would be easily out of range for Edward's ability to be able to reach us.

I sat down on a large rock that had a perfectly flat top. "Jasper-"

He interrupted me with a kiss upon my lips. A long, passionate kiss that I wished could have lasted forever.

I pushed him away, surprised that I was not out of breath, although I had just become a vampire, so that would explain most. "Jasper! What are we going to do? We can't just keep going on like this." I said, gazing into his beautiful, golden eyes. They were the same colours as Edward but they held a whole mysterious sensuality that Edward could never manage. Jasper was like a magnet, pulling me closer and closer towards him. I was powerless to it.

"What am I supposed to do? I can't just leave Alice…she believes I am her soul mate."

I lowered my head, feeling my hair curtain my face so that Jasper could not see my expression. "But - is it really right for us to be doing this? 'Playing around' behind our partner's backs?"

He placed a hand upon my shoulder. "What other choice do we have?" He placed his finger under my chin and delicately tilted my head upwards so that I was looking into his eyes once again.

I sighed and closed mine. "We don't have one." I admitted, experiencing the sensation of a stone dropping to the pit of my stomach as the truth dawned on me. Jasper and I would have to have a secret relationship. There was no other thing for it.

Jasper brushed his lips against my forehead. "I'm sorry it has to be this way." He said.

I threw my arms around him and placed my lips upon his once again, never wanting to let go and never having to. With neither of us breathing, this euphoria could last for all eternity and we would never run out of breath, need to eat, or any other ordinary human needs.

His arms wrapped around my waist and pulled my body closer to his, so close that our bodies were touching. My legs clasped around his waist.

"I love you, Bella." He whispered into my ear.

"I love you." I whispered back, placing my lips onto his.

After we had been connected for some time, I suddenly had a thought that made my skin become populated by goosebumps. "Won't Alice foresee this?" I asked Jasper, finally pulling my lips away from his and looking into his eyes to see his reaction.

His facial expression changed to one of horror. "I hadn't considered that aspect to our relationship. Of course she will foresee it." He released me from his grasp and then walked away, tracing a circle in the grass with his path.

"We thought over the Edward ordeal pretty easily." I said. The idea was not to think of the other whilst Edward was close enough to read your thoughts. But Alice's gift would be harder to escape. The only way that I knew of was to mingle with the wolves in La Push. As Jasper is a vampire, and I am also one, that idea was out of the question. That one would have scared her anyway, our images in her head just disappeared; like we didn't exist.

"Her gift is harder to evade." Jasper said, stating the obvious. "She could see into our relationship at anytime. She could see that we are doing something wrong. Her visions come without warning these days."

I dipped my head, looking at my shoes. "I don't know what we're going to do."

He walked over to me again and captured me in an embrace. "We'll just have to wait and hope that she doesn't discover."

I snuggled up against him. I wished that she wouldn't find out. I hoped that she wouldn't discover our secret. This dirty little secret.


	3. Chapter Three: Shield From The Future

Shield From The Future-

"Is she still blocked from you?" Emmett asked, gazing at Edward, whose eyes were closed tightly. He was concentrating on attempting to read my mind again.

Edward sighed. "Yeah," he opened his eyes and looked at me. "Her mind is blocking me, same as it did when she was human."

I blinked rapidly. I had forgotten that Edward was unable to read _my _mind. I was able to think of Jasper whenever I wish then.

Secretly smiling to myself, I turned to Emmett. "What does this mean?" I asked him, not feeling quite in the right state to ask Edward about anything at that moment.

Emmett shrugged his shoulders. "Maybe you're a shield." He said quietly.

"_A shield_?!" He asked. His beautiful, melodic voice made my heart jump as it played throughout my head.

"More than likely, Jasper." Carlisle said. "Try to block Jasper, Bella." Carlisle pointed to Jasper before beckoning him foreword with the same finger.

Jasper reluctantly walked over towards me.

I bit my lip as I looked into his eyes; those beautiful, smouldering eyes that I loved so much. I gave an outward breath as he closed the gap between us. He smelled so beautiful, like the forest just after it has rained. Like nature.

"Block him." Carlisle commanded to me.

I nodded as Jasper set his mood-changing abilities upon me. I closed my eyes and focused as a wave of phenomenal euphoria swept over my body. I knew I had to stop it but really wished that I didn't have to. This was the euphoria that I only ever experienced with Jasper. Edward could never have done this to me.

I focused on creating a brick wall, building it around myself. And elastic feeling panged within my brain, almost like it was bouncing weapons off of the walls of my brain. The euphoria disappeared and I was left with a feeling on stress and confusion.

"She can't block me!" Jasper said in an arrogant tone.

I opened my eyes and saw him smirking in Edward's direction.

He was now sat upon the crisp white sofa, his arms folded and an expression of anger plastered upon his face.

_If looks could kill…_I thought to myself, swallowing hard because of my guilt.

"She can block me though!" Alice said; her voice less than chirpy but it still contained some of its usual happiness. "I was viewing her future – and she just disappeared from it, like she wasn't a part of her own future." Her facial expression distorted into one of confusion. "You would be able to hide your future one me if you wished."

I felt my heart flutter as my eyes glanced in Jasper's direction. I could hide what he and I were doing and Alice would never know.

I could see that the corners of his mouth turned up ever so slightly to form a hidden smile.

"I saw something though," Alice said, turning to look at Emmett. "You're going to have a shock, brother." She laughed after she had finished her sentence, although I felt that it was some what forced.

Emmett raised his eyebrow and gave his full-heart-belly-laugh a whole round before stopping and pretending to wipe away tears. "How many of them am I gonna blind?" He asked jokingly.

Everyone in the room laughed. Everyone, except Jasper and I, both of us relieved that we had discovered a way to hide ourselves from both Alice and Jasper. I could have run around the house, screaming in glee but I knew that this was not wise.

I smiled at Jasper with my most sexy smile and Jasper returned with a smile that made me weak at the knees.

"Just keep your clothes on and you should only stun a couple." Alice joked, slapping Emmett upon his upper arm.

This whole scene was so happy…all too happy.

* * * *

I was laid on my bed hours later, reading my favourite book, _Wuthering Heights_, yet again. I couldn't even make an attempt at guessing how many times I had read this book now. The spine was cracked and some of the pages were falling out of it and placed back in with sticky tape.

"I think I should buy you a new version of that book." Jasper jested from the doorway.

I placed the book down upon my lap and stared at it as it just lay there, completely flat. "This book and I go back years." I replied in a chuckle.

Jasper sidled over to my bed and sat himself down. "That is certainly evident." He chuckled, moving his body closer and closer to mine every second.

I felt a breath catch in my throat as I placed my lips on his once again. This feeling was one that I knew nothing could compare to. It was almost as though electricity was being sent through my body, making me shiver with anticipation and excitement.

His silk fingers ran their way up and down my arms, intensifying the shivers. He stopped kissing my lips and began to caress my neck with his mouth.

I bit my bottom lip and shook violent with anticipation. I had never known what it felt like to want someone as badly as this. It was not the feeling of wanting to hold them and care for them. It was the feeling of pure and irrevocable lust. All I wanted was his body against mine, to feel him hard and strong against me.

I pushed myself on top of him, straddling his body and kissing him passionately on the mouth.

"I want you, Jasper." I whispered in a hurried voice.

"I want you too." He gasped back before kissing me again.

The door to my room slammed open.

Both Jasper and I froze.

"What the…?" Emmett gasped in shock.

This was the surprise that Alice had foreseen. Emmett finding me in Jasper's arms.


	4. Chapter Four: Traitors

Traitors-

"Emmett-"

"Bella, Jasper...how could you do this to Alice and Edward?" Emmett exclaimed, looking frantically from one to the other.

I lowered my head so that my hair curtained my face. I didn't want to look at Emmett. I could feel the guilt building in my chest now that I had been caught. Like the saying goes, it's fun and games until some gets hurt. And at that moment in time, I was hurting like hell.

"Don't say anything, Emmett. Please? Alice truly believes that I am her soulmate; I don't want to hurt her. I just know that she's not the one form me." Jasper said in a steady voice, turning to face me as he finished the sentence.

"You're already hurting her. You are being deceitful, Jasper. Discovering that you have been lied to by the one you love is like being kicked in the gut." His nose wrinkled, like he was going to growl and bare his teeth to Jasper in temper.

"Promise us, Emmett. Promise that you won't say anything." I pleaded, the weakness evident in my voice.

Emmett swallowed hard. "I can promise I won't say but I can't promise that they won't find out."

I bit into my lip, hard. I still expected to feel the reassuring warmth of blood underneath the pressure of my teeth but even these vampire teeth could not break the marble skin. Blood would not have flown anyway. I was hollow, cold and soulless now. I also must have had no heart to be able to commit a crime such as this. Edward was the one that I said I loved, the one who everyone was sure I was going to spend the rest of my life with, yet here I was, in Jasper's arms. I knew that Jasper was the one I loved; I had just met Edward first.

"Alice might foresee this, you know." Emmett blurted out, sounding almost hopeful.

"She already predicted that you were in for a surprise, right? She didn't know what this surprise was though. I am guessing it was this." I muttered with slurred speech, hardly even moving my lips.

"Oh. Yeah, I forgot about that." He grumbled. "Edward still might read someone's thoughts." There was a malicious undertone to his voice that I took an immediate disliking to. If I had still been human, my heart would have been pounding with fear, sweat might be covering my palms and the hairs on the back of my neck would have stood on end at the sound of this voice. None of which happened but something within me wished it would. I was beginning to miss that feeling of being human. All those human needs that I would never need again, those human things I would never do again. I could never cry with joy, laughter or sorrow. Never could I sleep and dream of the one I loved and I could never eat human food. Never again would I be normal. I was special now. I was immortal.

"Well, you'll just have to stop yourself from thinking about it whilst you're around him, won't you? I managed it perfectly well." Jasper replied smugly.

I just grimaced to myself. I couldn't bare the thought of either Alice or Edward discovering our dirty little secret. Then again, I guess that this would teach me not to do stupid things again. If you break the rules, you're going to get caught, whether it be sooner or later.

"I can't be the one faulted if I slip up. I'm not as 'skilled' in deception as you two obviously are." Emmett said with a slight hiss before walking from the door way to the stairs.

I gazed in Jasper's eyes. "What are we going to do?" I asked, pain washing through my body when the idea of being separated from him came into my head.

"We're going to wait and see how this turns out. I'm not giving you up, no matter how this turns out." He whispered.

My only reply was a smile just before I placed my lips on his.

* * * *

The whole family were sat at the Cullen dining table. No food was going to be eaten, as per usual. It was just a gathering place for us, a place where the whole family could get together and talk or have some 'quality family time'. The Cullens were the only family that I knew of who still had activities that involved the whole family; most of us had abandoned this tradition years ago.

Edward and Emmett were playing some sort of card game. I had never been the one who knew what to do during these sorts of games. I just watched and hoped that I would pick something up along the way. So far, I had had no luck of any sort with that task.

"We've got to go. Bella, you up for it?" Alice squeaked, positively bouncing up and down in her seat.

"Huh? Up for what, Alice?" I asked, sounding about as groggy as I felt.

Alice rolled her eyes. "Ready for the opening of that new clothes shop in Port Angeles, I hear that is going to be amazing. Clothes at reasonable prices that are also good quality, don't find that everyday now, do you?" She said with a chuckle.

I just weakly smiled back, wishing that I could at least feel the slightest bit nauseous at this moment in time instead of the void that I had in my stomach. The sickness would have made me feel more comfortable. It was a feeling that I had grown used to over the years. "I'll think about it. I'm not really that much of a shopper to be honest, Alice."

She shook her head. "That's obviously the one thing that the change _can't _change." She said with a slight chuckle.

I just continued to weakly smile. I couldn't think of another reaction. I just wanted the human feelings back. I wanted to feel the nausea that came with guilt and worry. I wanted to be able to sweat because of the stress that my lies were causing me. I wanted to know that I was still alive.

My musing was interrupted by the sound of cards being thrown on the floor.

I froze and stared over at Emmett and Edward, unable to move with fear.

Edward's face had an expression of rage plastered across it, his eyes becoming metaphorically dark.

"I-I win?" Emmett said weakly, holding up an ace of spades.

"Alice. We have some traitors among us." Was all that Edward said.

My nails dug into the table, peeling away the wood and making an awful scraping sound. He knew. Edward knew about what had happened. Emmett had broken his promise and thought about the incident whilst around Edward.

"What are you talking about, Edward?" Alice retorted in her usually overly happy voice.

I just wanted to hide, dwell in shadows and disappear. I didn't want him to find out. Not like this. I wanted to have told him myself if he had had to find out at all.

"Your 'soulmate' has been connected itself with another soul." He spat.

This was it. I knew what would happen next. Alice would become heart broken and everything would go to ruins. And it would all be my fault.

Alice just laughed. "Jasper wouldn't do that to me, would you Jazz?" She turned to face Jasper, who was sat at her side.

He faced her also. "I'm sorry, Alice."

A few seconds past before everything seemed to sink in. Her face crumpled in pain and anguish just before she stormed out of the kitchen in a flurry, knocking all the remaining cards onto the floor with the rest of the deck.

Edward promptly followed after her, an expression of pure disgust plastered across his face. "I never loved you anyway, Bella." He slammed the door behind him.


	5. Chapter Five: Souls

Souls – 

I wandered upstairs to where Alice and Edward had disappeared to during dinner. I sighed with disbelieve and disappointment, both with myself and with Emmett. How had I let this whole relationship with Jasper get so out of hand? It started off as an accident, just a kiss, and now it had become a full blown affair. And then Emmett had gone and blown our secret by just thinking about it whilst near Edward. We had entrusted him with that piece of information, and had to spill it to them.

I stepped through the open door, which lead to Edward's bedroom. I rested my hand upon the frame. "Edward-"

"I know. I acted like a child down there. I lost it. I know I'm going to lose you." He gazed back at me, his full of sadness.

"Edward. I... I'm sorry." I stretched out my hand to touch his shoulder.

He shifted his weight so that I could not reach him. "I love you, Bella. I always will and I'll always be here for you. Just...don't expect me to stick around for the wedding." He spoke the last part through gritted teeth before turning on his heel and storming past me, almost knocking me to the floor.

I clenched my jaw, tightly. I just wished that Jasper was having more luck.

I was sat at the table with Jasper in the early hours of the morning. He had explained to me that he hadn't been successful with Alice either. She had, in fact, taken it worse than Edward had done. After about ten minutes of incoherent, sob filled sentences, she had stormed out of the room and left the house, taking with her a suitcase and her yellow Porsche.

I slammed my head against the table, hearing it splinter with complaints.

"Bella, this isn't going to fix anything. We can't control how we feel." Jasper placed a hand upon my shoulder in a comforting manner.

"But, Jasper, they truly believe that-"

"What they believe are their problems, not ours." He placed a kiss upon my cheek.

I turned my body round to kiss him passionately on the lips. When I had been human, this would have hurt, made my heart ache or my stomach knot. The worst thing was: I felt nothing, none of those comforting feelings, telling me that I still had a conscience, had a soul left within my being. Maybe Edward had been right, with becoming a Vampire came the gift of immortality, and the departure of your soul. I wanted to shiver with fear and sickness but neither of which I could feel. Neither of which could I conjure. Since I had become a vampire, I felt empty. Hollow. Almost like every one of my human qualities had been stripped from me.

"Bella, Jasper!" Esmé shouted at us.

Both Jasper and I turned to face both Esmé and Carlisle.

Carlisle plunged his hand into his pocket. "Alice and Edward have gone. They left a note for me but you two should read it," He handed me a neatly folded piece of paper. "And you may want to try your best to get them back."

I unfolded the note and read it whilst Jasper peered over my shoulder. It was written in Edward's beautiful handwriting and made me gasp as I read the words written upon it.

"Carlisle,

Alice and I have left for Italy. We are sorry to have to do this but neither of us can exist without our other-halves. I do hope that you will understand. I hope that both Jasper and Bella have a 'happy' existence together.

Edward."

I clasped my hand to my mouth and mimicked a squeak.

Jasper placed a hand upon my shoulder and squeezed.

I turned to face him, hating the fact that I could no longer cry. I just wanted to burst with tears but nothing came.

Jasper turned to face Carlisle. "We're going to get them."


End file.
